Dear Mason

3 hours old

3 years old

mason,
your bright, blue, hypnotizing eyes are like a window to your soul. you are by far the most expressive child i have ever encountered. looking at you in all your innocence i see the compassion you already bear, the love and joy you embody, the hurt you occasionally feel, and the awe and amazement you experience in every passing moment of each day.

the "terrible twos" officially came to a close for you today. sure, you went bonkers your share of times and we've had our highly unpleasant battles of wills, but all in all, this year has been pretty awesome.

there was a shift this year. in the past, i've written about your shyness and your "slow to warm up" tendencies, but that has begun to fade away. usually at storytime at the library, you would just sit quietly and not interact. but when we went two weeks ago, things were very different. rather than quietly sitting on your carpet square sipping your juice box, you were leaping up to answer each of the questions. "that's a lion!" you shouted and then you roared. you were eager. you were confident. you were engaged. you knew all the answers. you were something so very different than even a month ago. and i was so proud.

this year, something also shifted in the way i viewed you. rather than viewing you as vulnerable, i came to view you as strong. so incredibly strong. and you are so incredibly responsible for your age. and sensible. and thoughtful. and empathetic. and observant. and funny. and beautiful. you, my little girl, are amazing. you are amazing as a person who has just turned three. i do not know exactly what you will do with yourself as an adult (other than preslee’s proclamation that you will be a fish), but you will be something. something fierce. something fantastic.

i do not worry how you will turn out. i think about your future all the time, but i don't worry how you will turn out.

i know.

you are an incredible little person with capabilities and traits that don't belong on someone your age. you will never be anything other than amazing. so i don't wonder.


i know.

i love you, i am amazed by you, mason. you are three, which is mind blowing but somehow not as devastating as i once felt the loss of your babyhood was. i am just loving watching you grow. watching you learn. watching you soar.


i was so lucky to have you be my baby. but i am far luckier to have you be my
daughter.

happy third birthday macey may. i love you,
mommy